Book Review: Raising Trans Kids

Raising Trans Kids: What to Expect When You Weren’t Expecting This
Rebecca Minor, LICSW

Review written by Taylor Harmon, MA, CSE

In a time of alarming and rising anti-transgender legislation, rhetoric, and violence, Rebecca Minor’s book is a thoughtful and comprehensive introduction to challenging cisnormativity, and understanding and supporting folks who identify on the gender diverse spectrum. While this book is marketed towards parents of trans, nonbinary, and genderqueer kids, it is a valuable resource for any person wishing to expand their understanding of trans issues, as well as challenging their assumptions, biases, and misconceptions.

Minor takes care to separate her chapters into common-held arguments and talking points against trans identities and communities- Aren’t they too young to know? Is trans identity anti-feminist? What if they’re wrong and they change their mind?- and addresses each of these topics using evidence from the scientific world, the natural world, and testimonies from trans folks and their loved ones. This structure allows readers to navigate addressing specific questions or concerns with ease, and are provided a recap of each chapter at its conclusion for increased accessibility and comprehension.

The book also includes self-assessments and thought exercises for cisgender readers to participate in; emphasizing the importance of cisgender people exploring their relationship to gender as well. One of my personal favorites, The Gender Identity Challenge, emphasizes the importance of cisgender people exploring their relationship to gender by challenging folks to explain their gender and how they know they are that gender without referencing body parts or using gendered terms/language. This exercise in introspection reveals the ways in which external forces largely contribute to our gender identity, whether you are transgender or cisgender, and the ways it impacts us on a deeply personal level.

Perhaps what is most refreshing about Minor’s book is the judgement free approach to the work she prompts her readers to do. In a world where conversations between those with differing viewpoints tends to create further divide– especially when it comes to the transgender and genderqueer community– Minor acknowledges the discomfort that may arise and provides practical tools for facilitating difficult conversations while also affirming that simply picking up her book is an indication that a reader wants to understand another perspective and is open to doing the work that it takes. Whether you are a parent or loved one of a trans person, hoping to find answers to questions you have been afraid to ask, or simply brush up on up-to-date terminology and research, this book offers something for everyone.